By - pooppuppeteer
Do whatever you need to do to minimize your guilt should it fail. For me, that meant losing some weight (I had two months to “prep” for FET), abstaining from alcohol and eating a wholesome diet. After FET and during the TWW, it meant doing my best to stay calm. I crocheted for keep my mind busy when I wasn’t at work.
I only had one shot also, after two ERs. We weren’t going to go through another ER. I now have a beautiful 1.5 year old son.
All the best to you and wishing you a successful FET. Xoxo
Oh this just made me cry hopeful tears. Thank you. Congrats on your success! Fingers crossed we are as lucky ♥️
Laughter is clinically proven to increase your chances of the embryo implanting! After the transfer we watched a lot of standup and funny videos
What a fun thing to read! I’ll be sure to throw on some stand-up comedy on my FET day. ☺️
Ha! Love this! Thanks ☺️
I agree with your clinic. We all wish there was more in our control, but really all you can do is feed yourself, keep hydrated, take your vitamins, and take your meds on time. Success and failure isn't because of anything you did, necessarily.
Good luck with your upcoming transfer!
Yes, hard to relinquish control I suppose
I lived my life. I had a glass of wine the night before my transfer. I took my vitamins and the day after my transfer I went to a happy hour with work people (I wasn’t drinking of course). I did a bit of walking that day and told myself I was getting the blood flowing to my uterus. I watched some funny movies. Other than that, it was business as usual. All I did was limit my caffeine intake. I was honestly at peace with the whole thing no matter which way it went. It was successful.
I had an amazing massage the evening before my fresh transfer, which was early the next morning. I have no idea if it actually helped, but I know it helped get my blood flowing and helped me relax mentally. I went into the transfer feeling really relaxed and positive. The transfer was successful! Good luck!
Awe, that’s a great idea. I hear of people taking Anti-anxiety meds before the transfer, to be as relaxed as possible… wondering if that may be helpful 🤔
I’m posting a million times in a row, but [here’s a really interesting study](https://www.reddit.com/r/IVF/comments/qgznpp/interesting_publication_from_the_american_society/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) I read right before my transfer that I found really informative.
Ooo! Thank you for both of these links! Even just doing little things helps me to feel grounded and that I am controlling what I can (even if it’s a bit of a façade). And knowing where to put my energy (massage and a funny movie sounds like the ticket) is helpful. Thank you! ♥️
I guess I was thinking more about blood tests, “mock transfers”, immune testing etc. beforehand… I’ve heard about ensuring you do these things… but maybe it isn’t really a thing?
Mock transfers are for sure a thing! I just switched clinics after my first (failed) FET. The first one my RE had great difficulty getting the catheter through my cervix, so my new RE wants to do a trial transfer to take a closer look at my cervix. You can definitely ask your RE if they would suggest doing a mock transfer prior. I’ve heard/read things about an ERA too. It’s a test that determines the exact number of hours of progesterone you need before transfer. I don’t know much about it though so I won’t be able to answer any questions about it! Possibly something to look into?
Our clinic advised not to retest when this happens as well. We were a bit disappointed they wouldn’t retest but seems this is a common approach.
My first transfer, I did all the the “things” - ate warm foods only, pretty much was on bed rest for 3-4 days after, wore warm socks, did acupuncture before and after.
It was a 5AA tested embryo and didn’t take. I got my period the day before beta…
That was my only embryo from that ER.
Not going to lie, I got pretty despondent after that. Even though it was only our first shot, i felt as though if I had the perfect embryo and it’s still failed, what hope would I have for future transfers?
We did another ER, we had mentally and emotionally committed ourselves to 3 rounds, but this time got 4x 5 day embryos, we didn’t do testing and transferred our best 4AA. I did none of the things I did in the first round. I went out to lunch straight after the transfer and had an iced coffee frappe.
I went about my daily life in the 2 week wait. I wasn’t reckless, but i wasn’t wrapped in cotton wool either. I was pretty much in a state of “walls up” self preservation.
I’m now 25+4 with a healthy baby boy from that.
Of course this is purely anecdotal, but everything on here is and will be.
I wish you all the very best and hope this month is your month.
I found [this post ](https://www.reddit.com/r/IVF/comments/fljrfi/when_should_i_test_an_informative_post/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)really helpful for after the transfer (it’s about testing)