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This is one of my favourite reads today. Your response to him behaving like a drunken lying AH was just perfect. He should be ashamed of himself. You are NTA.


Right lol. Great post! I honestly don’t understand this idea, too, that when people are gigantic AHs you should approach them “gently.” Did bf display such considerations when he manipulated the bar owner? Lol




/u/SameNegotiatiod is a comment stealing bot. Original comment here: https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/yt9x5x/aita_for_leaving_my_bf_a_sarcastic_get_well_soon/iw2yvcd/


Well stomach virus means he should be taking meds. Well hooch is medicine. /s


I presume that the brother who told OP this would like OP to treat that information as a little more privileged -- like, "I want you to know about this BS going on," and not, "I want you to call out my brother (your bf) over this information that only I could've given to you."




Yeah this guy sounds 30 years younger. Not the prime time for male suiters. Ditch the boyfriend with a card. NTA


Wait... I scrolled back up... 50?! I thought early 20s doing that shit. 50?!


Midlife crisis maybe? Absolutely ridiculous whatever the reason.


I guess he's been a giant D all his life. Taking advantage of the poor woman who has a crush on him is nothing someone can do without practice.




Maybe he's loaded and with him only having months to live, stick it out. /s


Yeah, at the bottom of the card it should have said PS Remind me where you keep your Will?




My thoughts exactly. I'd dump his ass.


I am just curious are we sure the BF never went to the doctor and wasn't given the diagnosis of 18 months to live? I can't imagine OP was with BF 24/7.


I’d say I’m 99% sure. He owns a flip phone, everything goes through me. If I don’t set the appointments up, he won’t bother. No bills, emails, letters, insurance paperwork, or texts.


Are you a secretary/personal assistant, or girlfriend? Why stay?


Sort of, we run a business together. He IS behaving like something is wrong mentally though and I’m not impressed.


Because he cheated on you in the backroom with the bartender.


Oh god. What have you gotten yourself into?


Nothing too crazy, we still live fairly separate lives. We don’t even live together. If I wanted to leave the situation I could with not too much stress.


I'm relieved for you. Honestly he sounds immature. Why are his redeeming qualities?


He cooks, cleans, actually listens, helps lesson my load when I need him to. He’s excellent at his job, is good with the finances, he’s handsome AND handy (yes, an old Red Green joke). He’s also an ornery older guy who relies on me to do old school “womanly work” like make appointments for him etc. I was able to look past that due to his pro list but this is ridiculous. I don’t know what is going on.


Maybe this stupid flex "Imma die" is not so stupid after all. Or he actually cheated on you and feels like the rightful asshole in the story.


But what is his end game? Was he planning to proclaim a miracle 18 months from now? Invite everyone to his funeral and then leave town to find new mourners--I mean *friends*? Develop a new fake terminal disease? ​ Edit for clarity.


Good. Do so. Oh and smoking and talking is probably not all that happened in the back room...


Why do you have to be his parent and manage all his appointments? I think something is off about him.


He’s still 100% an AH in this circumstance but I’m just wondering- do you think it’s possible that he’s avoiding going to the doctor *because* they mentioned the possibility of cancer and deep down he’s worried it could be the case? Unfortunately that kind of avoidance is really common in men.


I think it’s a big possibility, his brother agrees.


Ah. I thought his brother saying you should have talked to him about it "gently" was weird and loaded. This explains it. NTA. Your bro lied to get preferential treatment and sympathy from a bar and deserved some light shizz for it. He should get the scan.


You should be concerned, being impressed should be the least of your priorities, to be honest. If he is mentally unwell take the appropriate steps. You seem to know your value, please, ACT your value.


If he's suddenly acting like something is wrong mentally, and he goes to things if you set them up for him, get him a psych evaluation. He's not too young for early onset for any number of conditions that cause mental decline. Rule those things out.


In the OP though she said he never ever goes to the doctor, so I’m not sure she could trick him into a psych eval, but I definitely agree that a good ol’ physical & possibly a psych eval afterwards would be a great place to start figuring out wtf is going on with him right now. Up to him if he wants to actually fix anything, though.


That's fair. I would think anyways if he did get that type of prognosis he would have told you at minimum and not some bartender for free food. My condolences that you have to deal with this and at a minimum this guy needs therapy.


Do you really think that just because they're not together 24/7 that he wouldn't have mentioned something about how he's actively DYING?


Grief does weird things to people. Its pure speculation to say what a person might do. Anyways I responded to OP answering this that if he really did have this diagnosis I would believe he would tell someone close to him and not some bartender for free food.


YES! Ive actually had customers try this shit when i was a bartender. I never fell for it though. I always said "oh well since your dying, my tip will be high since you cant take the money to the grave right"?? amazing how their tunes change then


Yeah i wonder what's going to happen in 18 months and he is still alive.


Probably that he was miraculously cured.


I'm waiting for the part where she calls him her ex-boyfriend


I'm dying laughing. Next time he needs to go to ER he better call his friendly bar maid!




NTA. That’s borderline cheating. He deserved it.


Are we sure it wasn't full on cheating? The woman who has a crush on him invited him to the back room to smoke and talk. Was the brother or others there as well? Because I can easily see her making a move if she thought that he was dying and that she probably wasn't going to see him ever again.


It’s most likely full on cheating


I'm honestly shocked this isn't being talked about that much in other comments. It's extremely concerning that he accepted such an invitation, regardless of whether or not he ended up cheating.


Yep this. He's behaving like "something is wrong, mentally" according to OP elsewhere. He cheated and OP hasn't realized it yet. OP needs to go to that bar and tell the bartender the truth. Guaranteed she's gonna get a rude awakening when the bartender realizes she was had.


Yeah there is, at minimum, a 100% chance he cheated. NTA OP, but Y W B T A if you don’t dump the chump.


Right. If he did fool around with her, he did so under horribly manipulative false pretenses. "Huge crush" or not, that's a terrible lie to tell someone. If he's comfortable weaving a tale as despicably self-serving as "you have to be nice to me because I'm dying," would he have any problem lying that was single? He was probably telling the bar owner that op "abandoned him" after his "diagnosis."


Yep. I just said same.


Guy got possible life altering or even ending news. Is ignoring the bad news… Midlife crisis. He’s absolutely cheating.


Nta and I love the pettiness. He wants to manipulate people like that then he deserves the card.


NTA - if my partner was telling people he was dying to get special treatment then I’d be far more petty! At least you gave him well wishes and hoped he’d get well soon! I think he gave you an out and if he thinks flirting with a girl you both know has a thing for him, I think it’s pretty clear you’re better off letting him do his own thing in his own space while you go live your best life without him!!


I hate it when people play with other people's feelings. It's just SO DAMNED horrible. NTA.


Be as petty as you want. No need to be nice with a cheater. YNA and he deserves whatever you do and more.


NTA - Honestly what did the brother think was going to happen?? The fact that she is finding this out from him makes it worse than hearing the BS from her bc. And he is having intestinal issues, HE SHOULD NOT BE DRINKING.


NTA. I think that’s funny. Tell him you will apologize when he actually goes to a doctor. I will never understand why men do this. There is nothing masculine about roughing it out and not following doctors orders. There is an old saying for nurses in an ER. If they have to choose who to see next between an obviously Sick person in the waiting room and a man in camo/flannel/overalls not outwardly showing symptoms… you choose the man.


I disagree with this. Why choose the man that won’t follow doctor’s orders anyway, over someone who KNOWS they’re sick and wants to get better? F the man in camo!


>I will never understand why men do this. Because they are afraid of feeling weak and not in control of their own life.


\* conditioned by most people and society for the entirety of their life. I've been told unabashedly by "feminists" and people for equality that "they can't stand when men cry" and shut like that.


If he got butt-hurt about the snarky card, I'd be petty enough to send a card to the bar owner congratulating them on having such kind staff/patrons, but sending my regrets about the lies they were told. Ack! I bumped send prematurely. Oh, to be a fly on the wall the next time they visited that establishment! NTA and I'd be questioning why I was dating a middle-aged child.


NTA. He basically walked right into that one.


NTA, but if you want your bf to live tell him to go to the doctor. My mom had stomach aches appearing and disappearing for over a year before she went and by then she was too late.


He won’t go. I can try to push or force the issue again but I won’t hold my breath.


In that case I advise you to change this bf into an ex. Even if he isn't sick you're apparently not important enough to him to survive for. You can't depend on him, so why should he be able to depend on you?


I mean...he either cheated, or lied his ass off about something awful and gave a lot of people legitimate grief, in an attempt to cheat. There was no reason for him to go to the room of someone he knew liked him otherwise. And more than cheat- he either tried to coerce or succeeded in coercing her into sex by lying and putting her into an emotionally vulnerable state. That's beyond being an idiot and a cheater- that's predatory and dangerous. Honestly, I don't think you had enough of a reaction TBH. I would have been out of there so fast.


How absolutely sure are you that he didn't go and is not telling you? Telling you is admitting to himself the situation?


I would say that I’m 99% sure. No bills, no insurance paperwork, no emails, no letters. The man owns a flip phone, it all goes through me. If I don’t set the appointments up for him, he doesn’t bother.


The man is 50 and he needs you to play mommy? And he lies to women that have crushes on him so he gets special attention from them? Sounds like a real winner.


Why are you with this loser? He doesn't sound like he has much going for him...


Please know you deserve better. Why stay? Just why? Reddit has disappointed me yet again. Aim higher. Really. The bar has been set too low.


So maybe consider separating from this mess and giving yourself a chance at a future with someone who will stick around….and not require you to be their Mommy. Turn off, at the least.


Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Love the pettiness. Nta.


I had a friend do this but with lung cancer as the cause. He was in supposedly NOLA where he was from(I was about 2k miles away) undergoing treatment. My best friend and I flew there to say goodbye to him…only he wasn’t there. He magically reappeared in our hometown a week before we went saying he wanted to be with his mom for however much time he had left. Tickets were nonrefundable so we went on vacation still after he encouraged us to go. We FaceTimed him every day so he could be a part of the trip still…we get back, and after a bit of drama involving a suicide threat to his cousin, I got a weird feeling and called said cousin. Turns out there was never any cancer. He has a benign nodule in his lung that developed after his exposure to some chemical in Iraq in the 90s that got tested every so often to make sure it didn’t become malignant. Twenty some years later, it still isn’t. It’s basically scar tissue. Mfer wove this web of lies for attention and to fuel his alcoholism (read: get free drinks at bars and special treatment). He ended up having to relocate due to the backlash. He got 86ed from every where and pretty much shunned so he couldn’t find work. I mean, how can you trust someone enough to hire them, let alone just have them around when they lie about fucking CANCER?? Ugh NTA and he should be happy all he got was a petty card has a lesson


The sad part is that Karma is listening, and it seems like when people lie about being sick, they end up sick. Or maybe it’s that the subconscious mind is listening.


Yes, I think you are 💯right. Words have power, even lying words.


INFO: why are you still with this guy?


The life insurance? /s


>I set it on his bed and we haven’t been doing well since. Sounds like you haven’t been doing well for a while.


Why, because he has his own bed? Many couples sleep better in separate beds. And some couples don’t live together.


Was his brother there in the back room? He cheated on you, OP


He was not back there, no.


Honey. Come on. You would be doing yourself a disservice by staying with him.


You know what happened in that back room, right?




Just accept that he’s a cheating AH. Then go forward from there.


nta. maybe you could've approached this more gently, sure, but who in their right mind pretends to be a dying person to get free shit


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NTA, so your boyfriend cheated on you, lied to a bunch of other people, and has been treating you like shit for a long time now because he refuses to put in the work that he needs to. Don't listen to his brother, that's literally his sibling of course he's going to take that asshole's side cuz he benefited in that situation. Your boyfriend cheated on you, you don't have to be nice about that. And on the point of things haven't been doing well since, they weren't doing well before because your boyfriend was actively mistreating you. -I added it because I kept calling him your husband, but he's your boyfriend. He's even easier to leave!


NTA. He did something really creepy and fucked up. Did he also get some 'about to die' head while he was there? Gross.


NTA You're absolutely brilliant. Your boyfriend is a manipulative user, though. He knows the bar owner has a crush on him, he lied to her that he's dying to get her to dote on him, free food and drinks etc. That's disgusting behaviour!


>etc To be clear, "etc" in this context includes accepting an invitation from the owner to go into the back room to "smoke and talk" and totally not have sex.


Plot twist: He did go to the doctor and was told he only has 18 months to live. That's why he's being snappy about it, he's not ready to talk about it. He was feeling down that evening and overshared with the bar owner.


^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** 2 months ago my (40f) bf (50m) had some pretty severe stomach pains while we were staying at his hunting cabin and I ended up having to take him to the ER. He was diagnosed with inflammation of the intestines due to a stomach virus. They recommended he get a scan once we got home to rule out any stomach tumors or cancer. My bf has never gone back to see a doctor, nor will he. If anyone here brings it up he gets snappy. He no longer has any pain and is living normally again. Last weekend bf went to his cabin with his brother. I found out from his brother that bf went to their favorite bar up there and told the owner and her sons that the doctor only gave him 18 more months to live, that he’s dying. The owner of this bar has a huge crush on him so she immediately freaked out and all night bf got special treatment. Along with feee food and drinks she took him in her back room to smoke and talk instead of making him go outside. He was acting like a drunken moron and his brother was pissed/concerned. Here’s where I got petty: I bought a Get Well Soon card and signed it, “I’m sorry to hear that you’ll be dead soon. I hope your friends at the bar continue to give you all of the special love and attention you so desperately need in this trying time.” I set it on his bed and we haven’t been doing well since. Bf is mad and his brother says that I should have gently approached him instead. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


NTA. You're amazing and your BF is, well, not. If you want to up the ante, you can choose music for the memorial service and make him a playlist for his car.


Omg, I love it!! I should ask him about flowers…


You should! Ask him if he'd prefer arrangements or just a spray on the coffin. Seriously though, you had the greatest response - this internet stranger is proud of you!


Maybe you’d be better off pretending he is dead, and moving on with your life. This is serious, you need to ask yourself if you want to stay with an immature fool of a boyfriend? Or dump the AH, and give yourself permission to find someone decent/worthy/somewhat normal. You get it, I can tell. You’ve about had it. If you need encouragement to leave his ass, here it is! You go, girl! Get better & feel better!


>Along with free food and drinks she took him in her back room to smoke and talk instead of making him go outside. I'm certain they did more than smoke & talk. NTA. Protect your assets.


NTA I bow to your epic petty get well soon card. It's inspiring.


Nope nope nope nope... NTA but also leave that dude. There are two options here: a) he is not actually sick and he said so to get some pitty points. He's manipulative and in my book that's borderline cheating Or b) he's actually sick, and he's keeping a life-changing situation from you, WHILE using it to garner other people's sympathy. He's still manipulative, but he's also lying to you about something that will greatly impact your future. Either way, he sucks. Leeeave, yesterday is too late already


As someone who lost their grandad 4 weeks ago to lung cancer and is now caring for my disabled father who got diagnosed with the same cancer 2 weeks ago, this really really enraged me. Lying about dying is seriously F'ed up!! OP you are NTA But I'd be concerned with the clear red flag your partner has displayed here. What else has he lied about in the past to people to get special treatment?


So true! Lying about dying is a huge discredit to anyone fighting a potentially life threatening disease! Like WTF, can’t someone see how wrong that is? OP, how can you stand your bf now? I hope he becomes an ex soon!


You should go to the bar and personally thank the owner for being so accommodating during his time of need. Let it slip that he was suffering from severe constipation aka **he was full of shit**. Tell her his tummy is all better after all those free drinks and "special treatment" in the back room.


NTA and i LIVE for this pettiness. your bf pulling that is actually so manipulative and insanely selfish; i cant imagine playing with someones emotions in that manner. get him some balloons next! ;)


NTA bwahahaha that card was AWESOME!!! Why should you appologize? He should be the one apologizing to everyone for telling them he has cancer!! Who tf does that?!?


NTA What was his plan in 18 mod? Sell the cabin so the bartender never realized her was still alive?


NTA this is the level of petty that I aspire to.


NTA and you're amazing.


I have never laughed so hard at one of these posts! NTA, but he is for stringing people along. What you did is just perfect and if he can't take a joke, he shouldn't be messing with other people the way he is.


Plot twist: BF actually DID go to doctor for scans and really DOES have 18 months to live, just hasn’t told OP… (NTA)


NTA. My friend just died of liver cancer. It’s no joke. If me, I’d dump this A H.


Beautiful! You aren't an AH, you just called him on his BS. He might not be dying but you should strongly consider making him single. Anyone who lies about dying to get attention from another woman by manipulating her feelings for him is an AH and not to be trusted. Run far, run fast.


How could smoking and drinking and eating bar food help a stomach condition? omg. She's out of her mind and your BF was really Big Wheeling that one. Your response was frankly brilliant. Hilarious. I don't blame you a bit or have any contempt for your humor. NTA. Live long and prosper girl. Bravo! 😂


'his brother say that I should have gently approached him instead' Well yes, he's only got 18 months to live! NTA


Gonna be awkward when he keeps going back to that cabin every year.


This made my day! NTA


NTA / fantastic


NTA although I’d suggest taking his brothers advice, which would potentially help you avoid any more issues unless you’d like the relationship to end over this.


Nta , it was really funny and he deserved it .


NTA, I love this!


NTA and mucho points for creativity in your response. I hope he got it.


NTA I live for pettiness.


NTA so he's lying about having cancer to get attention and free drinks but you have been told off for not being gentle? Pft put the bf in the bin


NTA. That was hilarious.


Hahahaha I LOVE it! I'm crying with laughter. Why were you supposed to baby him? And his reaction is the reaction of a person who got caught doing something they damn well know they shouldn't have been doing.


Oh gosh OP, thank you for this read, truly. NTA. Hilarious.


NTA, you just responded to the news he gave out.


I like it. I don't even think it's petty. It's kinder than spelling out the reality for him in no uncertain terms. The sarcasm tells him you know and you don't approve and lets him think about it. I guess he's thinking about it. Consider giving him all the time in the world. NTA


NTA. A friends dad did this to him and it was such a sad situation




NTA. I love it!!


nta, i don't know why he'd be offended by that.


NTA - I am here for the petty.


Nta. Are you sure that all that happened in the back room?


Wow..... just...wow. How is he going to explain his existence in the future? It's a miracle? You are definitely NTA but your boyfriend is. I lost my mom to pancreatic cancer so maybe I am too sensitive but I think lying about having cancer is horrible, especially using it to play on someone's emotions to get free food. I don't think he deserves to have a gentle approach. He deserves a verbal punch to the face. You were much kinder than I would have been.


Yes, face punch, maybe dumpster bound.


NTA. Your next card should be a "hope your recovery goes smoothly" when you break up with him. If he's been doing this behind your back in front of his brother, what's he been doing when no one is around to get this kind of special treatment?


NTA. If he didn't want the lie to surface, he shouldn't have told it. Tell him to join the Russian marines and get his toughski Shitski ticket punched.


You're a Rockstar! If he wants to throw a temper tantrum over being called out on his horrible lie, you shouldn't be asking yourself if you're TA, you should be asking why you're still with him. NTA


Nta. Your boyfriend sounds insane.


He cheated. I love your response but dump his sorry behind. NTA.


NTA. If a 50yr old man can’t handle getting called out on his outrageous bullshit…he should rethink telling people outrageous bullshit. Problem solved.


NTA. I laughed out loud about your card. Faking like you have a terminal disease to get special treatment is really scummy behaviour.


As someone who’s been in and out of the hospital a lot, I’d have broken up with them if they’d pulled a stunt like that lmao. NTA he deserved it and should know.


NTA. that was a funny way of calling him out. reminds me of the time i sent my now ex an edible arrangement of just melon when i was mad


NTA Your bf is just as bad as those whacked out people that start cancer go fund me pages and pocketing the funds. Pity money. Dump him. How could you ever trust him again going forward?


NTA. He’s a grown ass man acting like a fool for some free beer.


Omg breakup Your bf is displaying disgusting behavior and being manipulative. Breakup. NTA Your bf is TA.


I wouldn't gently approach him. I'd let the woman at the bar have him. NTA.


NTA. this is beautiful lmao what a fool he is. He gonna act like a fool than be treated like one too 💁‍♀️


Waiting for OP to hear how when gets close to 18 month timeline if he goes into the bar and announces he’s been cured or goes earlier and tells them he was misdiagnosed so all is well and hallelujah! Oh and NTA


Who the F… tells people they are dying so they can reap tons of love, attention and free stuff? That’s deeply creepy, and I would dump his a$$ right away. Like, there’s something wrong with him.




What a great idea well done you


NTA. He parlayed this into an opportunity to spend time with a woman who's got a crush on him? Yeah, be as sarcastic as you want.


He's 50. Born in 1972, was a teenager in the 80s, a young adult in the 90s. There's literally zero excuse for him to have what he calls "old world ways"--he wasn't born in 1945. He grew up with working women, women in every possible job, and men taking care of themselves. There's no excuse for him to want you to be his maid, to make all his doctor appointments, to take care of him like he's a little kid. Also: he's 50. Why is he unable to take care of himself? Why does he refuse to go to a doctor even though he may actually have something wrong with him? Why does he only have a flip phone and make YOU take care of everything? And then... why does he go to a bar without you, and lie to everyone that he's going to die soon, and happily accept free drinks and special treatment from another woman? And why does he have absolutely zero sense of awareness and even less of a sense of humor about any of this? And finally--YOU are 40. You're still absolutely in your prime, barely into middle age, vital, competent, independent, fully living your life. WHY ARE YOU WITH HIM????? You can do SO much better! He not only sounds like a loser, he sounds like he actually isn't functioning as an adult. What do you need that for?


This is the best thing I have read all day.


Love this 🤣


Alright this might be the petty in me but I think this response is amazing! NTA


Maybe a tiny little bit of am AH but well deserved and beautifully petty 😚 NTA


Lol, NTA


NTA He’s a jerk, a liar and a shitty bf. You can probably do better.


YTA because instead of leaving this relationship with a person who you clearly dislike and cannot respect (whether that's deserved on his end is beside the point) you are staying with him and being mean to him. When you get to the point of having such hatred and contempt for your partner, it's time to do everyone involved a favor and call it quits. You would NOT be TA for calling out his behavior. For giving him an ultimatum to take his health seriously or else you can't keep supporting him. For ending the relationship because he's a liar and flirt. That would all be reasonable. But you chose to both continue enabling his bad behavior while also being unkind and that is just bs.


Lmao NTA, what a stellar response to something completely insane. Telling a bunch of people that you're DYING when you're not is so very messed up, and I would seriously question staying in a relationship with someone who felt comfortable telling such an enormous lie.


NTA and I love it


As my father and I like to say: don’t dish it out if you can’t take it 🤷‍♀️


The only thing wrong with this post is your self doubt. You should be strutting like a peacock after giving him your witty card. Most mothers would be ashamed if their sons lied about their health to get free kickbacks. What total lack of integrity. I'm pretty sure acting like this is pretty normal. NTA


NTA and this is so awesome!! Good for you!


Y T A your bf is dying getting him a get well soon card is pretty insensitive s/ NTA pretty funny


NTA. And your boyfriend should be your ex-boyfriend.


Nta. He doesn’t deserve you


TA? Your bf is a major AH. Major. Honestly I think people who use illnesses and diseases to gain something, especially when they, afatk, are healthy, are manipulative and repulsive. You however, are an absolute legend!


NTA. That’s hilarious.


That is hilarious If my wife did that I would just have to laugh it off Sure he put his foot in his mouth




Nta. Dump him after yelling bar the truth


NTA, but I would bet my last $50 he was had sex with that woman.


info, do you two even like each other?


So...how will he explain his continued existence after 18 months?


NTA and it sounds like the brother is trying to tell you he cheated in that back room without telling you your bf cheated in that back room.


Tbh this sounds like it’s less about the trip and the ridiculous story and more that you are worried about your partner’s health and angry he isn’t addressing what could be quite a serious issue. Instead of going to the doctor he’s going around making up silly stories and acting like he could die while you are truly afraid that yes, he could. Approaching him directly about your fear would probably be better than joining in his ridiculous games. ESH.


NTA and he’s a manipulative AH. Who says stuff like that? And what happens when he’s ok 2 or 3 years down the road? A miracle cure? Or is he going to be fundraising for special treatments? Who else has he got fooled? What other small/large lies has he told because this is a **huge** one. I think your card was hilarious but I also think you need a new boyfriend because this 50 year old (!!) one is old enough to know better. His brother isn’t much better either. What a pair of turds.


NTA. No offense but you’re too old for this. Too old for the card, too old to be dating a man this awful, and too old to not have dumped him already after this.


NTA. That was brilliant.


NTA I would send a card to his favourite bar telling them thanks for their support. Then update them that your husband is going to pull through after all. So he can’t pull this crap again.


NTA - So your boyfriend told a woman that he knew was attracted to him that he was dying, and then excepted an offer to go back to her room with her? Dying to have sex with her, maybe. Yeah he’s to be broken up with immediately not only is he a liar, he’s a cheater. And his brother saw him lie, get drunk and leave with another woman but told you to be nicer? OP even if he was ACTUALLY dying, this wouldn’t be ok.


NTA. I LOVE what you did. He is just pissed because he got called out on being a liar. His brother is NO better.


Is this guy from New Hampshire? Cause he sounds just like my super abusive and manipulative ex boyfriend. He had everyone believing that he was dying from gastrointestinal cancer.


NTA.... Please go back to the bar and tell owner he's not dying, he had poop shoot issues and see if she spills the beans about the back room. That post will be my second favorite read


A grown man lied about cancer for special treatment? and *you* might be TA for calling him out on it? Absolutely not, I'd be this petty too. Do you want to be in a relationship with him? He sounds awful.